Fuck Tempeh

Fuck patriarchy, fuck islamophobia, fuck Pantone, fuck stress, fuck back-to-school madness, fuck Bell and capitalism ripping off mental health activism, fuck abusers returning to their fame with zero accountability, fuck white people who think I’m exotic, fuck the white dude in that literature class and that tone he adopts when he gives a ~deep analysis~, fuck profs taking attendance during add/ drop, fuck ~neutrality~ and ~objectivity~, fuck “I don’t like politics”, fuck anxiety, fuck the academia circle jerk, fuck tokenism.

Fuck Instagram, fuck fragile male egos, fuck those people who only hit you up when they see you doing better, fuck those people who only hit you up when they need shit, fuck the rat race, fuck falling out of a window and breaking your arm, fuck the wait time for counselling services, fuck watered-down filter coffee, fuck cheap landlords, fuck $80 non-refundable course packs, fuck the McGill smoking ban, fuck kombucha.

Fuck running after a bus and seeing the driver say goodbye and for a second regretting saying you support the STM strike but then remembering that you hate the bourgeoisie and you should not hate on this driver who’s just doing their job and probably gets hated on by a bunch of random commuters in addition to their managing executive, fuck taxis, fuck ferries, fuck private jets.

Fuck stressing about grad school to the point of endangering your undergrad ‘success,’ fuck success, fuck LinkedIn, fuck marketability, fuck ‘flexibility’ when they really mean precarity, fuck cutting spending for the poor and slashing taxes for the rich, fuck trickle-down economics, fuck Reagan, fuck Thatcher, fuck Trudeau, fuck Trudeau’s “rule of law” when he means “I’m going to pipeline unceded territory and call the army on Indigenous land defenders,” fuck Canadian exceptionalism, fuck Trudeau’s selfie politics, fuck Macron, fuck neoliberalism. Fuck using the word neoliberalism to sound smart, fuck academic elitism, fuck self-righteousness, fuck small bladders, fuck blisters on your heels from new shoes, fuck the erasure of class in discussions of oppression.

Fuck McGill residence for tricking first years into overpriced meal plans and closet- size rooms, fuck the Redpath vending machine for stealing my $20 bill, fuck that inflatable tube man on Redpath that McGill spent our tuition on, fuck University Center renovations, fuck construction delays, fuck the red tape on McTavish to cover up for construction gone wrong.

Fuck liberals, fuck fedoras, fuck cis-het men dressing like queer boys to be edgy but who will never know what the prostate is about, fuck queers judging each other’s performance of queerness, fuck queers pressuring other queers to perform queerness better, fuck femmephobia, fuck masc4masc, fuck your racist “it’s just a preference,” fuck your Oriental fetish, fuck neglecting self care, fuck saying sorry for no reason, fuck saying yes when you really wanted to say hell no.

Fuck not sleeping so you can finish your readings, fuck GPA, fuck white male professors who smell like mayonnaise from across the room, fuck feeling incapable of affecting change, fuck cops, fuck crêpes, fuck the French, fuck students who refuse to engage with Montreal outside the bubble, fuck chia seeds, fuck avocado, fuck tofu, fuck tempeh.

Fuck intergenerational trauma, fuck ancestral language loss, fuck sleep, fuck meaningless sex, fuck post-coital depression, fuck writing fuck lists when u should really be sleeping, fuck meat, fuck astrology, fuck men who don’t believe in astrology but still believe in patriarchy, fuck Chad, fuck the NSA, fuck I*, fuck borders, fuck Grimes and Elon, fuck benevolent capitalism, fuck Jeff Bezos, fuck Trump.

Fuck handwritten love letters three years later, fuck Netflix, fuck Tinder, fuck InDesign, fuck people who can pronounce “Nietzsche” but not my name, fuck folks who love my food but not my people, fuck Sheryl Sandberg, fuck professors who tone-police, fuck anti-homeless architecture, fuck blaming climate change on individuals instead of corporations and governments, fuck single-use plastic bottles, fuck mediocre white men getting credit for being woke, fuck that woke boy who would still prefer you to shave.

Fuck homophobic parents who are “worried you’re still single,” fuck expensive food on campus, fuck disordered eating, fuck exploiting students through unpaid internships, fuck not acknowledging your own white-passing privilege, fuck knowing your prof is a predator and still having to take his class, fuck being sick, fuck entitled jerks in poli sci classes, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck.