“Are you going out tonight?” is one of the most commonly uttered phrases to run energetically down residence hallways, float through the breeze on warm campus afternoons, and settle on the screens of our devices. While it always contains the same five words, this sentence can carry a multitude of meanings depending on who delivers it. At McGill, we love to work hard and play hard, but what does ”play hard” actually mean for each of us?
When we think of a successful night out, our minds each conjure a different image. It could be dancing at a club with our friends, barhopping, going to a house party, listening to live music — the list is endless. One person’s heaven could easily be another person’s hell, and this differentiation is not entirely random. Social groups often share similarities in what they would like a night out to look like, which usually depends on gender, sexuality, and socioeconomic class.
In order to better understand the going out culture here at McGill, I conducted a small survey. The respondents were students of varying genders, sexualities, and university years.
The question I found to be the most important and interesting was “What makes a night out feel successful for you?” Whether we know it or not, we all have some kind of objective in mind when getting ready to go out. In my survey, I provided the following options for this question:
- Having fun with friends
- Meeting new people
- Drinking/partying
- Romantic/sexual encounters
- Other
Unsurprisingly, nearly every survey respondent checked the box “Having fun with friends”, regardless of gender, sexuality, or year. This seems to be the most powerful motivating factor for university students to go out, who, justifiably, want to make memories with their peers. “Drinking/partying” was the next most commonly checked box, followed by “Meeting new people”, and in last place “Romantic/sexual encounters.”
Not all results were so obvious, however. When asked how far they were willing to travel on a night out, 40% of respondents answered either 20-30 minutes or 30+ minutes. This surprised me, because I assumed fewer students would be willing to travel farther, opting to stay within a close radius to home. Most of us do not have cars, so we rely on either Uber or the Metro if we want to go further than destinations within our walkable bubble. If students are willing to travel lengthy amounts of time to go out, what does this say about the destinations close to us?
Additionally, around 30% of respondents indicated spending between $30-40, $40-50, and $50+ on a night out. This was on the higher end of what I expected, but aligns with the often costly prices of drinks and cover fees. Interestingly, around half of the people who indicated that they spent these higher amounts said they go out strictly once a week, while the other half said they go out more than three times a week.
Other survey questions included preferences about going out locations (options included “club,” “bar,” “house party,” “restaurant,” and “other”), days of the week one typically goes out, and the size of the “going out” group.
From what I have experienced and observed at university, “girls’ nights out” can take on many forms. They often start with getting ready together, playing music, taking photos, having a “pregame”, and then heading out, whether that’s to dance at clubs, socialize in bars, restaurants, or even jazz clubs. While the main focus is to have fun together, about a quarter of female respondents in my survey expressed that a romantic partner is part of what makes a night successful for them.
Male respondents followed a similar pattern, with roughly a fifth noting the same about leaving the night with a romantic partner. Their ideal nights typically started by having drinks at home with friends before going out to a bar, pub, or house party. Few men described clubbing as their preference, though multiple admitted that they would go if their friends were heading there. While my survey did contain an option for other genders, all my respondents selected the options of either male or female, which is why I have no conclusive evidence on non-binary groups.
Additionally in my survey, when asked, “Do you ever feel social pressures (to drink, hook up, spend money) on a night out?” the majority of respondents answered with “yes” or “sometimes”. These pressures stem from the clashing of different aforementioned goals one has when going out. One person may head out simply to have fun with friends, while another may be hoping to meet a romantic/sexual partner. It’s not unusual for these two people to cross paths. While this may cause no issue, it could also potentially derail the evening of either party, leading to hurt feelings, disappointment, or awkwardness. This is when the politics of a night out come to surface. Yet, even when a night takes a sour turn, I have found that when around the right group of people, bad moments almost always turn into good memories.
Over the past couple of years, I have had the time to learn what I like most in my nights out and curate them accordingly. Going out my first year at McGill was driven by excitement, fresh energy, and, for the most part, clubs. My friends and I frequented nightclubs like Cafe Campus and Pow Pow, following pregames consisting of packed rooms, laughter, spilled drinks, and open windows. These nights made for countless amazing memories, but I always found that my favourite parts actually happened while getting ready, when we would all be crammed in our little dorm rooms taking pictures on our digital cameras, and talking about our goals for the night while being caught up in the glow of our friendship.
This year, there is a different feeling in the air, one that I like even better. Weekends are now usually spent at house parties, and the pre-club magic I used to cherish has become the main event. When my friends and I do want the night to last, we often go out to a pub like McKibbins that lets us socialize, listen to live music, and dance. There is truly nothing like a night out with the girls, and every day I am thankful for how lucky I am to have found such good souls to surround myself with.
No matter who you are or what a fun night looks like to you, the most important part of social life in university is finding your people. While night out opinions may differ, there will always be a group out there waiting to welcome you. Upon reflection, the politics of a night out matter far less than the people beside you at the nightclub, pub, house party, or restaurant table. In the end, the moments shared are what make the night worth remembering.