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April Horoscopes

Hello Aries, goodbye Daily!

Aries season is upon us, and with it the end of the Daily’s 2020-2021 publication cycle. As finals approach and the seasons shift, now is a time for change, growth, and renewal. Don’t cut all your hair off, but maybe try a new pair of shoes or shake up your breakfast routine. If you’re thinking about whether or not you should do it, you should probably just do it.


Sometimes things don’t quite go as planned, but this is YOUR season! Even the unexpected is in your favor, so trust the process and don’t overthink it. Life is like a twelve-tone composition: kind of confusing, but surprisingly pretty.


Somewhere out there, you have a coworker/friend who is very grateful for all of the time that you’ve spent together. Eat cupcakes with them. Also: I know that you’re putting off talking to that person. Just do it. (oh and you’re mom gay) 


You definitely keep things interesting. This week, spend some time reflecting on the impact that your actions can have on others. Hopefully that introspection will shed some light on your own problems, too — like why your Minecraft spawns always suck. There’s gotta be something fixable there, right?


Chaotic, competent, and creative – your energy is beyond appreciated this week. Trust your judgement, but don’t bite off more than you can chew. Speaking of which, treat yourself to a nice meal, if you can! And treat your coworkers with kindness. 


We’re entirely convinced that you’re cooler than we’ll ever be. That’s poggers, bro. Aries season brings you support from all sides, so be sure to let your loved ones know you miss them. If you have any siblings, they might enjoy the occasional call. 


Your taste in media is impeccable, and everyone around you benefits from it. That said, please stop sending your friends Y/N TikToks. They love you, just not that much.


You’re the funniest person in every room you walk into – we wish we could be you. Keep doing your thing and don’t change for anyone. That being said: when’s the last time you felt a genuine human connection? Maybe try a cat.


It’s not easy to be accommodating while keeping your boundaries firm, but this week you’ve got it down. You’re great at what you do now, and change should excite you as much as it scares you. The only person still worrying about it is you!


We’re genuinely amazed at how powerful you are. Everything you do is incredible, and you emanate an awe-inspiring aura. We think your coworkers might want to be friends with you… Tell your cat hi from us.


Aries season will bring you confidence and new opportunities to grow, both professionally and personally. You might feel unprepared, but trust us – you’re ready. Listen to a #problematicfave and get your confidence up. Maybe some old 3oh!3, or Blueface. Just a random selection.


Because you might not be the loudest in the room, you might sometimes feel like your work goes unnoticed. You’re very talented and your contributions are important. One big plus of choosing your moments is that when you do share a joke with the people around you, it goes twice as hard. 


Your energy is irreplaceable, and you fit in a team like one of those T blocks in a Tetris game: perfectly, and also shaped like a T. There’s an editor out there who wouldn’t be the same without you. Cupcakes sound like a fantastic plan. (and please remember: you’re sister bisexual)

As we sign off on the last installment of our (admittedly short-lived) horoscopes column, we want to thank all of our fantastic co-editors, contributors, and readers. The stars have good things in store for the Daily. We just know it.

With love and epic vibes,

Kate Ellis (Coordinating Editor 2019-2021) and Willa Holt (Managing Editor 2019-2021)