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Mama Matina’s Monthly Roast: NOveMBER!!!

Mama Matina is back!


Knight of Wands

Love that you’re finally getting your license, just know that Mercury’s in retrograde so you might get banned from all the driving centres in Ontario!


Ace of Swords

Instead of jerking off to erotic fanfiction maybe you should try going to bed at a reasonable hour


Six of Cups

Get your roommate flowers! I’m sure they’d appreciate it :)


King of Cups

For Halloween, dress as the main character of tonally inconsistent fable about a disaffected crone discovering the joys of root vegetables and warm milk


Five of Wands

Oh… this is just a mess


The Lovers

Stop looking for a ““boyfriend”” and start looking for a feywild tree spirit to help you find mushrooms on your urban foraging adventures<3


Six of Swords

Pilot a gondola down the St. Lawrence and celebrate National Calzone Day in style! Strega Nona would be proud :’)


Three of Pentacles

One of these days your prof is gonna ask you why you’re wearing a Teletubbies onesie. Tinky Winky? Really?


King of Wands

If you’re going to wear your blanket like a cape, might as well find a nice walking stick and go for a stroll! Majestic :)


Page of Wands

Ah, I see — or should I say smell ;) –you’re one of those essential oil bitches! Mmmm ylang ylang



Light all the incense you want, but you really need to clean your freezer….


Four of Pentacles

I know you said a leprechaun gave them to you, but I think you just had one too many shrooms last night. Babes, it’s chocolate, not “pure gold from ‘neath the kelly green hills”

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