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Dear Diary

Dear Diary,

It was a tough day at work today, so I’m feeling really down. The anarchists had their usual manif contre moi and I swear to God some of them were throwing orange cones. Like you know the cones that they use to direct traffic? They were actually throwing them at us. It was unbelievable, the lack of respect. I’m almost at a loss for words. I mean, that rubber is like really, really hard. I think I even have a bruise forming on my arm. Can you believe it? When the anarchists behave like that I mean it really just makes you feel…unwelcome. Like you’re not wanted, you know? I mean, it just really hurts your feelings when they act like that. Like I know that kid lost an eye from that flash bang grenade we threw at him, but like c’mon we had to do that, y’know? It was totally like, a necessary action, because they didn’t tell us where they were going on their march. But the cones is just way too far! I didn’t sign up for this at the police academy.

Thank God I had that billy club, and helmet, and shield, and flak jacket, and horse, and gun, and pepper spray. Like, those anarchists should really just respect our space you know? We need a space that is, like, safe, for us. Like a safe space for cops.  Ugh, anyway off to bed, will definitely sleep tight, my arms are so tired from cracking skulls and sending skinny anarchists to the hospital.


—An SPVM Riot Cop