Dirty Talk

Posted at 01:30PM on Mar 20, 2008 by web

If you don't already appreciate the joys of spending hours fiddling with bikes caked in lovingly-accumulated Montreal road filth, it's time for us have a little sit-down.

While most of us will never acquire the mechanical acumen necessary to strip a car, or even a motorcycle, down to its respective bits and then get it back on the road again, the humble bicycle is likely within your reach. We're talking about two wheels, a doohickey to make 'em turn, and a doohickey to make them stop — you can DO this. Along the way, you'll gain a healthy working relationship with wrenches, grease, and colorful curses in a language of your choice. You'll also feel your chest swelling with pride as you raise your grimy hand to your brow and search the horizon for your next destination, your resurrected steel steed clenched between your thighs and your entire balcony covered in rust, tools, and the heady scent of fresh accomplishment.

If I lost you there, don't worry. This kind of thing isn't for everyone — but you won't know for sure until you try!

P.S. About those hands. I like to keep a bunch of these in my backpack -- because you never know when you'll need to help someone get their chain back on...